LyriCritic: Miracles - Insane Clown Posse

Miracles - Insane Clown Posse

A LyriCritic Review

How much hate am I gonna get for this one?

Whatever it is that makes people enjoy ICP, it must be something incredible. I don't know, maybe I just don't see it, because I despise ICP. Though, whatever makes them great to the "juggalo" community must also make them something that other people will defend to the death. Chances are, if you speak out against ICP, someone is gonna call you out. If there is a jugglo reading this, turn away now. I have NOTHING nice to say about this song.

Don't say I didn't warn you...

If magic is all we've ever known
Then it's easy to miss what really goes on

And right off the bat we have lyrics that try to sound clever, but are devoid of any logic at all...Allow me to explain: If magic is all we've ever known, that's it. There's no reason to QUESTION what really goes on, because we only KNOW magic. We don't know there's something else going on, so we're not missing it. Missing something implies that it was in plain sight, you just didn't see it. And we're not LOOKING for something, because we don't know it's going on, and...

The circular reasoning has started.

But I've seen miracles in every way
And I see miracles everyday

 I thought it was easy to miss what really goes on? Huh...Must not be that hard.

Oceans spanning beyond my sight
And a million stars way above em at night

Welcome to the world, genius. I hope it's better than the underside of your rock.

We don't have to be high to look in the sky

 ...I'm finding it incredibly hard to not look at this as a drug reference, and I REALLY hope it isn't. 'Cause if it is...It's even worse than I thought.

And know that's a miracle opened wide
Look at the mountains, trees, the seven seas
And everything chilling underwater, please
Hot lava, snow, rain and fog
Long neck giraffes, and pet cats and dogs

What planet do you come from? If these things are miracles to you, I'd hate to see what learning about the thing Jesus did would do to you guys.

And I've seen eighty-five thousand people
All in one room, together as equals
Pure magic is the birth of my kids

 Actually, pure magic is something Harry Houdini did. Not you having a kid. Anyone can do that. And, let's face it...Not everyone should be allowed to.

I've seen shit that'll shock your eyelids

 Um...Ouch.

The sun and the moon, and even Mars
The Milky Way and fucking shooting stars
UFOs, a river flows
Plant a little seed and nature grows
Niagara falls and the pyramids
Everything you believed in as kids

 Again, not miracles. They are space, meteors, science fiction, nature, photosynthesis, more nature, man made objects, and Santa Claus respectively. Not miracles.

Fucking rainbows

 ...Oh, I've got nothing to say to this. It speaks for itself, honestly. Moving on.

after it rains
There's enough miracles here to blow your brains

 Cause a head exploding is miraculous. Good to know, ICP. Good to know.

I fed a fish to a pelican at Frisco bay
It tried to eat my cell phone, he ran away

 ...No, wait. Hold on. Stop.

...WHAT?

How does this have anything to do with ANYTHING? That's not a miracle, and I don't see how it could be taken as one! WHAT THE HELL DOES IT EVEN MEAN? I just...

I need a moment...

And I come back to this blog post 20 minutes later, and I dread continuing. But...It has to be done.

And music is magic, pure and clean
You can feel it and hear it but it can't be seen

Somehow, I think feeling and hearing this would be worse than actually seeing it alone. It's pretty horrific with just sight and sound, but to FEEL this and hear it? Kill it with fire.

Music is all magic
(Are you a firm believer in miracles)
You can't even hold it
(Do you notice and recognize miracles)
It's just there in the air
(Are you a firm believer in miracles)

 Are...Are they even trying anymore?

 Pure motherfucking magic
Right?

No.

This shit'll blow your fucking mind
(Do you notice and recognize miracles)

 Yes, I do notice and recognize miracles. And so far, nothing tells me you two have any idea what a miracle is. At all. Kindly stop spewing vomit about things you know nothing about.

Music is a lot like love,

 Then you guys must SUCK at love.

It's all a feeling
And it fills the room, from the floor to the ceiling
I see miracles all around me
Stop and look around, it's all astounding

Again, it must not be easy to miss.

Water, fire, air and dirt

 Oh, god, no! It's coming up!

Fucking magnets, how do they work?

Ladies and gentlemen, this. THIS. This is truly the pinnacle of lyrical creativity. I applaud you for writing that line, and it makes so much sense. It evokes emotion, makes me feel, and makes me want to gouge out my eyes with a fork and eat them myself.

Fucking music, how does it work?

And I don't wanna talk to a scientist
Y'all motherfuckers lying, and getting me pissed

 No, you SHOULD talk to one. You might LEARN something!

Solar eclipse, and vicious weather
Fifteen thousand Juggalos together

Sounds like an omen to me...

And I love my mom for giving me this

 Um...?

Time on this planet, taking nothing for granted
I seen a caterpillar turn into a butterfly
Miracles ain't nothing to lie

 Oh, okay.

Shaggy's little boys look just like Shaggy
And my little boy looks just like daddy
Miracles each and every where you look

 No, that would be genetics. You might wanna reconsider not talking to a scientist.

And nobody has to stay where they put
This world is yours for you to explore
There's nothing but miracles beyond your door
The Dark Carnival is your invitation
To witness them without explanation
Take a look at this fine creation
And enjoy it better with appreciation
Crows, ghosts, the midnight coast
The wonders of the world, mysteries the most
Just open your mind, and it ain't no way
To ignore the miracles of every day

 I thought there was MAGIC everyday? Make up your MIND, ICP.

(Are you a firm believer in miracles)
Magic everywhere in this bitch

Please don't say that. Ever again...

(Do you notice and recognize miracles)
It's all around you, you don't even know it
(Are you a firm believer in miracles)
Magic everywhere in this bitch

Here I was thinking you were gonna listen...

Shit's crazy
(Do you notice and recognize miracles,
So many miracles, the magic miracles)

 Are you a firm believer in miracles
Do you have time for the miracles
Do you notice and recognize miracles
So many miracles, the magic miracles
Are you a firm believer in miracles
Do you have time for the miracles
Do you notice and recognize miracles
So many miracles, the magic miracles
Are you a firm believer in miracles
Do you have time for the miracles
Do you notice and recognize miracles
So many miracles, the magic miracles
Are you a firm believer in miracles
Do you have time for the miracles
Do you notice and recognize miracles
So many miracles, the magic miracles

 Annnnd...No.

This song...There's not a single redeeming value in it. The beat is bad, the lyrics are HORRID, the music video freaks me out, and I just hate the song and everything about it.

I don't know what people find appealing about this music, but to each their own. Oh, and the only reason there was another song done today, is because I just got really bored and wanted to do something semi-productive.

If you want me to review a particular song, send it off to rantsinrap@gmail.com and I'll be in touch.

Until next time...I'm the LyriCritic, and if you question the lyrics...I probably will too.

LyriCritic: Call Me Maybe - Carly Rae Jepsen

Call Me Maybe - Carly Rae Jepsen

A LyriCritic Review

Welcome to the world of Pop music, ladies and gentlemen...

To the uninitiated, let me offer a few words of advice: Don't even bother trying.

Modern Pop music is basically the reason I stick with most of the older stuff. Recently, I've made a realization that music that uses real instruments instead of synthesized beeps and boops no longer exists. And if they DO have a real instrument, it's not the main sound you hear. There are very few songs from the genre of Pop that I can actually sit down and enjoy, and if I was randomly asked what they were, I'd have to take a few minutes to remind myself what the names of them even are. This isn't a good thing. In fact, this is the worst possible thing that can ever happen in the music industry. When I think about it, I realize the reason I hate Pop so much is pretty simple:

They all sound the same.

Whether or not the tempo, beat, or sound differs, the same basic and generic emotion is apparent in every pop song I can think of. Every female artist whines about being unloved, losing love, partying, or sadness. Ever male artist semi-raps about partying, losing a girlfriend, hating females, or how awesome they are. And though the music can differ slightly from song to song, it all has the same generic bass beat, poor display of lyrical ability, and a singer that relies heavily on auto-tune or the "singing-but-not-really-singing" style that Ke$ha brought to the forefront.

Carly Rae Jepsen's most recent (and as far as I know, her only) hit, "Call Me Maybe", fits every single one of the above reasons for why I hate Pop.

Let's just hop right in.

I threw a wish in the well,
Don't ask me, I'll never tell
I looked to you as it fell,
And now you're in my way

Songs paint a picture, right? I mean, they're really just another form of telling a story. By logic, I should be able to deduce what's going on here by these four lines, right? Okay, let's give it a shot: She threw a wish in a well. Don't ask her, she'll never tell. She look to me as it fell, and now I'm in her way.

...What? I mean, the lyrics tell me something, yeah, but there's NOTHING else they give me. Even then, it's still confusing. What did you wish for? Why would you tell us you wished for it if you not going to let us know? So you dropped the "wish" and turned around right away? I'm confused, and I don't know HOW I'm in your way. You didn't say you looked to LEAVE, as it fell, so how am I in your way?

SONG! MAKE SENSE!

To be fair, it's only the first four lines. Let's see what we can get from a little more.

I'd trade my soul for a wish,Pennies and dimes for a kissI wasn't looking for this,But now you're in my way

...Losing faith in you, song. You wanna try to change that, maybe? Yeah? I'm waiting.

Your stare was holdin',Ripped jeans, skin was showin'Hot night, wind was blowin'Where you think you're going, baby?

"Where am I going? Well...I want to get away from you, because my mother told me never to talk to people who seem to be saying nonsense. Plus, I'm not sure where you got the ripped jeans bit, and I'm not keen to do a porno at the moment. This music video ends with me being gay, after all..."

Hey, I just met you,And this is crazy,But here's my number,So call me, maybe? 

No, and here's why: I JUST MET YOU. YES, THIS IS CRAZY. KEEP YOUR NUMBER. LEAVE ME ALONE, MAYBE?

It's hard to look right,At you baby,But here's my number,So call me, maybe?

Carley Rae Jepsen: The poster child for the decline in human interaction. Buy a phone and stalk someone today!

And all the other boys,Try to chase me,But here's my number,So call me, maybe?

The first two lines I doubt very highly. If all the other boys ARE trying to chase you, they should stop. You're keen on total strangers, and I foresee you not living very much longer if you continue with that lifestyle...

You took your time with the call,I took no time with the fallYou gave me nothing at all,But still, you're in my way

I have a hard time believing the guy called her voluntarily. Let's look at this a different way..."You took your time with the call," How do you know he's not busy and is just taking his time? Maybe you're watching him through the upstairs window? And once he saw you and called the cops, you were so alarmed you fell off the ladder you used to get up there, and then realized HE didn't give you the broken heart. You broke it yourself from hitting the ground that hard.

And I still don't understand how he's in your way. Are you trying to see THROUGH him, but he's too SOLID to be able to? I don't know, go listen to "Outside" by Staind. Maybe you'll learn a thing or two.

I beg, and borrow and stealHave foresight and it's realI didn't know I would feel it,But it's in my way

 Wait...Did Jepsen just go all Gollum on us? When did 'you' become 'it' and why is she stealing 'it' if it might not be real.

...Is it too late to change my emotional state from 'mildly annoyed' to 'totally terrified'?

Your stare was holdin',Ripped jeans, skin was showin'Hot night, wind was blowin'Where you think you're going, baby?

 Yeah, Carly. That's all well and good, but...What was all that stuff about in the last four lines?

Hey, I just met you,And this is crazy,But here's my number,So call me, maybe?

 Yeah, but...The other four lines?

It's hard to look right,At you baby,But here's my number,So call me, maybe?

Carly, I'm serious. I wanna know about those other fou-

Hey, I just met you,And this is crazy,But here's my number,So call me, maybe?

 ...You're just gonna keep singing and never mention them again, aren't you?

And all the other boys,Try to chase me,But here's my number,So call me, maybe?

Of course! I don't know why I expected any different...

Before you came into my lifeI missed you so badI missed you so badI missed you so, so bad

Oh, now that's just silly. That's the deal breaker right there. I can't take you seriously if you make a logical mistake like that. Nonsense! Call Me Maybe? Poppycock! Indeed.

This song hurts my brain.

It's Pop, and that already makes me head for the door, but the fact that this reached #1 on the charts and STAYED there just baffles me. I mean, this song doesn't SAY anything. It makes no sense, it touches on things that it doesn't wrap up, and the video tells a story that is TOTALLY different from what you get by listening to the song.

I just...Why do we listen to this? I mean, people MUST like it! But why? The beat isn't that catchy, the singing is sub-par  and the lyrics? Do I really need to say something about them?

I hate this song. I don't know why it was a thing, and I probably never will. But the good thing is it's starting to be played less and less, so the less I hear it the better.

If you want a particular song reviewed by me, send me an email at rantsinrap@gmail.com and I'll be in touch.

Until next time...I'm the LyriCritic, and if you question the lyrics...I probably will too.

LyriCritic: Just Lose It - Eminem

"Just Lose It" - Eminem

A LyriCritic Review

Let me just get one thing out of the way...

I don't hate this song. In fact, if I take it at face value, it's one of my favorite Eminem songs. It's ridiculous, but that's part of the fun. It has high energy, it doesn't take itself too seriously, and it's clear that Em is having fun himself.

But that's face value, and the saying goes that beauty is only skin deep.

The inside of this song makes me want to vomit...

First, a little background:

"Just Lose It" is the first single on the album Encore, which, despite selling well, is considered to be the beginning of Em's downfall as a lyricist and rapper. The lyrics of each song overall were less creative, the content was more dull, and it was just so different from what Eminem had grown popular from doing. Granted, a few of the songs are memorable for certain portions, but the album as a whole just doesn't stand out when compared to his previous works at the time. After Encore, Eminem began to decline faster and faster, becoming the subject of ridicule once he went on hiatus. I believe that "Just Lose It" along with the the album skits "Paul" and "Em Calls Paul" contributed mostly to what made him lose a lot of respect and notoriety with most of the hip-hop world and beyond.

At first glance, "Just Lose It" is an innocent song. This "first glance" lasts a few seconds, and then you realize the song's intent. At that point...You realize what you're in for...

Down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down!Okay...Guess who's back?Back againShady's backTell a friendWhaaaaaaaa!Now everyone report to the dance floorTo the dance floor, to the dance floorNow everyone report to the dance floorAlright stop.....Pajama time

From the moment Eminem starts making noise, you recognize the beat as the opening notes of "Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson.

Let that sink in for a second...

Eminem, one of hip-hop's most notorious artists, is making references to Michael Jackson around the time he was still the go-to guy for pedophile jokes. This is the same artist who, in a previous song, supported having sex with an under-aged teenager because "her bush has hair."

...I don't think I need to tell you where this one is headed.

Come here little kiddies, On my lapGuess who's back with a brand new rap?And I don't mean rap as in a new case of child molestation accusation

Hold on, lemme check the time-stamp on that one. Just a sec...

...Yep! It's under a minute. Folks, we're only 35 seconds into the song, and we've already insulted Michael Jackson twice times in less than two bars of rap. Eminem, I applaud you for such a feat. I would've waited until the chorus...

(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...The sounds of Lucifer's domain.

At this point, I've listened to the song multiple times already while writing this review and plotting what to say, and I still can't figure out why Em felt the need to include Pee-Wee Herman's laugh. Or why he felt the need to do it himself. Or what reminded a grown man of Pee-Wee Herman.

There are so many questions I have, and I'm sure the answers will be just as scary as what brought them about...

No worries, papa's got a brand new bag of toysWhat else could I possibly do to make noise?I done touched on everything, but little boys

See, what I think happened here, was Eminem was TRYING to make it look like Michael Jackson's legal trouble was all for attention. But when it ended up doing, was making me think Eminem just wants to make fun of Michael because...Who knows? Everybody else was doing it...

That's not a stab at MichaelThat's just a metaphor, I'm just psychoI go a little bit crazy sometimesI get a little bit out of control with my rhymes

Let's play a game...Out of these four lines, tell me which one tell the most bullshit lie. Ready? Go!

If you were able to pick just one, you're a better man than I. These two bars of verse either try to cover up the fact that Eminem is basically tea-bagging Michael Jackson while he lays face down in a pile of negative press, or are just Eminem saying words that rhyme and hoping people listening will be pleased with that.

If it's not a stab at Michael Jackson, why are you emulating Billie Jean's music? Why was there a Michael Jackson dancer in the opening scene? Why were the visual effects similar? Who else do you know that has had their hair catch on fire during a Pepsi ad? If you're not talking about Michael Jackson, who are you talking about? Janet?

It's not a metaphor either. A metaphor would be implying that an object is something else that is really isn't. "This song is a beautiful and respectable work of art" would be a metaphor. It's also a huge lie, but really, who's the bigger dick at this point?

Good God, dip, do a little slide
Bend down, touch your toes and just glide
Up the center of the dance floor
Like TP for my bunghole
And it's cool if you let one go
Nobody's gonna know, who'd hear it?
Give a little "poot poot", it's OK! [Fart Sound]
Oops my CD just skipped
And everyone just heard you let one rip

Eminem...Who did this to you?

You were once a controversial and talented musician that wrote thought provoking lyrics and put forth notions that really made people wonder about the different meanings of the subject.

Last time I checked, farting and Beavis the Butthead references weren't thought provoking OR controversial. They both just stink...

Now I'm gonna make you dance
It's your chance
Yeah boy shake that ass
Oops I mean girl girl girl girl
Girl you know you're my world
Alright now lose it
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Just lose it
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Go crazy
(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)
Oh baby
(HA-HA)
Oh baby, baby
(HA-HA)

So...Eminem often gets genders confused? That's good to know, I guess. It would explain the horrible sounds he makes in between lines. It's obviously telling us he made a mistake and called a woman the wrong gender, and is now laughing at himself to make it seem like a joke, when inside, he's horrified.

Or he could just be saying words. Take your pick.

Well, it's Friday and it's my dayJust to party all the way to SundayMaybe 'til Monday, I dunno what dayEveryday's just a holidayCrusin' on the freewayFeelin' kinda breezyGot the top down, lettin' my hair blowI dunno where I'm goin'All I know is when I get thereSomeone's gonna "touch my body"

...I'm sorry, what? Could we rewind a bit? I seem to have missed the part where Eminem explains what anything in this song means.

Excuse me miss, I don't mean to sound like a jerk

Too late.

But I'm feelin' just a little stressed out from work
Could you punch me in the stomach and pull my hair?
Spit on me, maybe gouge my eyes out? (Yeah)

Today's Headline: Famous Rapper Eminem Supports "Gore" Fetish...Also seems to forget what he was talking about before the chorus!

Now, what's your name girl?
What's your sign?

My name? Well, I'm glad you asked. See, my name is the Law, and my sign is right out there on my squad car. You're under arrest for mass stupidity and not making any sense. You have the right to remain silent, and we encourage you to firmly exercise that right for the remaining time in the song. Please...

"Man, you must be up out your mind"DRE! (HA-HA)Beer Goggles! Blind!I'm just tryna unwind

First off, I knew he lost his mind about 12 bars back. Dr. Dre must be a little slow if he's just now figuring that out. Second...I still don't understand the laugh. At all. Stop it. Third...What?

It's Tuesday and I'm locked upI'm in jail and I don't know what happened

You wouldn't believe me if I told you, man...You just wouldn't.

They say I was running butt nakedDown the street screaming(HA-HA-HA-HA-HA)

I don't doubt it, after everything we've seen so far. You seem like the type to do just that.

Well I'm sorry, I don't rememberAll I know is this muchI'm not guilty

For some reason, I doubt everything you just said there.

They said, "Save it, boy we gotcha you on tapeyellin' at an old lady to 'Touch my body!'"

Truly the most despicable of criminal acts. You sir, have no right to subject an elderly woman to hip-hop privates! The very fact that you would implore her to make contact with said objects...For shame!

Now this is the part where the rap breaks down

FINALLY!

It gets real intense, no one makes a sound

DAMMIT!

Everything looks like it's 8 Mile nowThe beat comes back and everybody lose themselves

Correction: Everything does NOT look like 8 Mile. 8 Mile was a great movie. This? I'm not entirely convinced this isn't a product of eating pizza before bed. Oh, and I lost myself a while ago. In the time it took to get to this bit, I found myself again, came back to finish the review, and realized how much more I could be doing with my life.

See what you've done to me, Em? You made me have a realization.

Shame on you, sir.

Shame on you.

Snap back to realityLook it's B.Rabbit!Yo you signed me up to battle!?I'm a grown man!Chubba chubba chubba chubba chubba chubbieI don't have any lines to go right here so, chubba teletubbie!

Reality: Lie
B-Rabbit: Lie
Grown man: Debatable
Not having anything of worth to say: Absolute truth

Fella's (WHAT?!) Fella's (WHAT?!)Grab you left nut, make your right one jealous (what?)Black girlsWhite girlsSkinny girlsFat girlsTall girlsSmall girlsI'm callin' all girls

That was the night every female in the world let the call go to their answering machines.

Everyone report to the dance floorIt's your chance for a little romance orButt squeezin' it's the seasonJust go (HA-HA-HA-HA)It's so appeasin'

Jesus, is he STILL saying something? I stopped caring a while ago.

UmMmMmm touch my bodyUmMmMmm touch my bodyOoh boy just touch my bodyI mean girl just touch my body

Short answer? No.

Long Answer? ...No.

"Just Lose It" was fun to hear once. Usually, the first time you hear a song, you're just enjoying the music. The second time, you listen more closely. The third time, you analyze, and the fourth time? You make judgments. During this review, the song was on loop in the background, so I heard it around 20 times, I think. Maybe more, I don't know...

The funny thing is, while the song only made fun of Michael Jackson outright during the first verse, more people hated what Eminem was doing more than they thought it was funny. And remember, this is MICHAEL JACKSON. The guy everyone loved to make a joke about? Yeah, he was being defended by other rappers.

The controversy section of Wikipedia states: The music video for "Just Lose It" generated controversy by parodying singer Michael Jackson's child molestation trial, plastic surgery and an incident in which Jackson's hair caught on fire while filming a Pepsi commercial in 1984.^[1] A week after the release of "Just Lose It", Jackson called into the radio show of Steve Harvey to report his displeasure with the video. "I am very angry at Eminem's depiction of me in his video," Jackson said in the interview. "I feel that it is outrageous and disrespectful. It is one thing to spoof, but it is another to be demeaning and insensitive." Jackson continued: "I've admired Eminem as an artist, and was shocked by this. The video was inappropriate and disrespectful to me, my children, my family and the community at large."^[2] Many of Jackson's supporters and friends spoke out about the video, including Stevie Wonder, who "watched" the video and called it"kicking a man while he's down" and "bullshit",^[3] and Steve Harvey, who declared, "Eminem has lost his ghetto pass. We want the pass back."^[3] The video was banned on the BET channel, after complaints from Benzino and others (but was later reinstated, as critics of the ban argued that Nelly's "Tip Drill" video could be seen. Both were only seen onBET: Uncut.) However MTV did not drop it, and the video became one of the most requested on the channel. 

If that wasn't enough, Eminem contacted 'Weird Al' Yankovic about the upcoming parody of "Lose Yourself" that Al was making. Weird Al says he was forced to stop production on the parody, which he has called "Couch Potato", because Eminem was worried that the song might "damage his image and reputation." Weird Al later stated in an interview, that "The irony of the 'Just Lost It' controversy isn't lost on me."

Eminem..."Couch Potato" doesn't even mention you. If anything, people would trace it back to the original, and that would HELP you. Being parodied by Weird Al RARELY has negative effects. It's mostly considered an honor.

There's not a lot left to say about the song, other than it was a shot and a miss for Em, and the hole he started digging with that song would prove to be the one he had the most trouble climbing out it.

It 2010, Eminem released his most recent studio album. Recovery is generally considered to be the album that brought Eminem back into the limelight, and proved that he still had a lot left to give.

Earlier on this year, Eminem announced that he was working on his next studio release. And given that I myself think he's past the days where songs like "Just Lose It" were all he could make, my hopes for his next release are high.

Don't let your fans down, Eminem. You might not be able to manage another recovery.

If you have a song you want me to review, send it in an email to rantsinrap@gmail.com and I'll be in touch.

Until next time...I'm the LyriCritic, and remember...If you question the lyrics, I probably will too.

Let's Get Critical, Critical!

You know, I'm all for being romantic and showing a lady the respect she deserves, (I'm also called a liar more often then I'd like, and honestly, I don't see why) but I think I'll leave the "getting physical" to Olivia Newton-John. Because she's got more sex appeal than a guy sitting behind a computer critiquing music could ever hope to have. Plus, she's a girl. So, there's that.

Can I get a segue, please? I think I almost made a fool of myself there...

I'm the Lyric Critic. I critique the lyrics of songs from any genre, and try to disguise the fact that I'm a sarcastic asshole by making it look legit. But rest assured, my opinion DOESN'T matter.

I just like to talk. It makes me feel like I'm important...

So, basic rundown:

1. I'll take email suggestions of songs to do. I'll attempt to do every song I receive, but it may take time to do so. So, if your review doesn't appear within a week, give it time, I'll get to it. Send your suggestions to: rantsinrap@gmail.com

2. There's no schedule as of right now. I'll post when I can, and I'll try to make it often. If this takes off, I'll try to get a post out three times a week. If I miss a few days, I'll make up for it or let you know why in advance.

3. Feel free to send me fan-mail too. Assuming I GET fans, that is...

4. This is my opinion. if you like a song I happen to do, I ask that you respect my thoughts if you want me to respect yours. It's fairly simple, and if you don't like a review...Don't comment on it and move along.

5. To start it off, here's a list of songs that I'll be doing over the course of the next few days:
- Just Lose It - Eminem
- Call Me Maybe - Carly Rae Jepsen
- Miracles - Insane Clown Posse
- Super Bass - Nicki Minaj
- Imma Be - Black Eyed Peas
- Payphone - Maroon 5 feat. Wiz Khalifa

I'll try to get these done in a timely manner, and then release a list of the next few songs to keep it going until I start getting suggestions.

6. If I feel like it, I'll release an audio version of the review. Why? I get bored, and I do things for no reason.

7. Uh...I got nothing. I just like the number seven.

So! The next post will be a review of "Just Lose It" and it will be up soon.

Stay tuned, and remember...If you question the lyrics, I probably will too.

- LyriCritic