LyriCritic: Miracles - Insane Clown Posse

Miracles - Insane Clown Posse

A LyriCritic Review

How much hate am I gonna get for this one?

Whatever it is that makes people enjoy ICP, it must be something incredible. I don't know, maybe I just don't see it, because I despise ICP. Though, whatever makes them great to the "juggalo" community must also make them something that other people will defend to the death. Chances are, if you speak out against ICP, someone is gonna call you out. If there is a jugglo reading this, turn away now. I have NOTHING nice to say about this song.

Don't say I didn't warn you...

If magic is all we've ever known
Then it's easy to miss what really goes on

And right off the bat we have lyrics that try to sound clever, but are devoid of any logic at all...Allow me to explain: If magic is all we've ever known, that's it. There's no reason to QUESTION what really goes on, because we only KNOW magic. We don't know there's something else going on, so we're not missing it. Missing something implies that it was in plain sight, you just didn't see it. And we're not LOOKING for something, because we don't know it's going on, and...

The circular reasoning has started.

But I've seen miracles in every way
And I see miracles everyday

 I thought it was easy to miss what really goes on? Huh...Must not be that hard.

Oceans spanning beyond my sight
And a million stars way above em at night

Welcome to the world, genius. I hope it's better than the underside of your rock.

We don't have to be high to look in the sky

 ...I'm finding it incredibly hard to not look at this as a drug reference, and I REALLY hope it isn't. 'Cause if it is...It's even worse than I thought.

And know that's a miracle opened wide
Look at the mountains, trees, the seven seas
And everything chilling underwater, please
Hot lava, snow, rain and fog
Long neck giraffes, and pet cats and dogs

What planet do you come from? If these things are miracles to you, I'd hate to see what learning about the thing Jesus did would do to you guys.

And I've seen eighty-five thousand people
All in one room, together as equals
Pure magic is the birth of my kids

 Actually, pure magic is something Harry Houdini did. Not you having a kid. Anyone can do that. And, let's face it...Not everyone should be allowed to.

I've seen shit that'll shock your eyelids

 Um...Ouch.

The sun and the moon, and even Mars
The Milky Way and fucking shooting stars
UFOs, a river flows
Plant a little seed and nature grows
Niagara falls and the pyramids
Everything you believed in as kids

 Again, not miracles. They are space, meteors, science fiction, nature, photosynthesis, more nature, man made objects, and Santa Claus respectively. Not miracles.

Fucking rainbows

 ...Oh, I've got nothing to say to this. It speaks for itself, honestly. Moving on.

after it rains
There's enough miracles here to blow your brains

 Cause a head exploding is miraculous. Good to know, ICP. Good to know.

I fed a fish to a pelican at Frisco bay
It tried to eat my cell phone, he ran away

 ...No, wait. Hold on. Stop.

...WHAT?

How does this have anything to do with ANYTHING? That's not a miracle, and I don't see how it could be taken as one! WHAT THE HELL DOES IT EVEN MEAN? I just...

I need a moment...

And I come back to this blog post 20 minutes later, and I dread continuing. But...It has to be done.

And music is magic, pure and clean
You can feel it and hear it but it can't be seen

Somehow, I think feeling and hearing this would be worse than actually seeing it alone. It's pretty horrific with just sight and sound, but to FEEL this and hear it? Kill it with fire.

Music is all magic
(Are you a firm believer in miracles)
You can't even hold it
(Do you notice and recognize miracles)
It's just there in the air
(Are you a firm believer in miracles)

 Are...Are they even trying anymore?

 Pure motherfucking magic
Right?

No.

This shit'll blow your fucking mind
(Do you notice and recognize miracles)

 Yes, I do notice and recognize miracles. And so far, nothing tells me you two have any idea what a miracle is. At all. Kindly stop spewing vomit about things you know nothing about.

Music is a lot like love,

 Then you guys must SUCK at love.

It's all a feeling
And it fills the room, from the floor to the ceiling
I see miracles all around me
Stop and look around, it's all astounding

Again, it must not be easy to miss.

Water, fire, air and dirt

 Oh, god, no! It's coming up!

Fucking magnets, how do they work?

Ladies and gentlemen, this. THIS. This is truly the pinnacle of lyrical creativity. I applaud you for writing that line, and it makes so much sense. It evokes emotion, makes me feel, and makes me want to gouge out my eyes with a fork and eat them myself.

Fucking music, how does it work?

And I don't wanna talk to a scientist
Y'all motherfuckers lying, and getting me pissed

 No, you SHOULD talk to one. You might LEARN something!

Solar eclipse, and vicious weather
Fifteen thousand Juggalos together

Sounds like an omen to me...

And I love my mom for giving me this

 Um...?

Time on this planet, taking nothing for granted
I seen a caterpillar turn into a butterfly
Miracles ain't nothing to lie

 Oh, okay.

Shaggy's little boys look just like Shaggy
And my little boy looks just like daddy
Miracles each and every where you look

 No, that would be genetics. You might wanna reconsider not talking to a scientist.

And nobody has to stay where they put
This world is yours for you to explore
There's nothing but miracles beyond your door
The Dark Carnival is your invitation
To witness them without explanation
Take a look at this fine creation
And enjoy it better with appreciation
Crows, ghosts, the midnight coast
The wonders of the world, mysteries the most
Just open your mind, and it ain't no way
To ignore the miracles of every day

 I thought there was MAGIC everyday? Make up your MIND, ICP.

(Are you a firm believer in miracles)
Magic everywhere in this bitch

Please don't say that. Ever again...

(Do you notice and recognize miracles)
It's all around you, you don't even know it
(Are you a firm believer in miracles)
Magic everywhere in this bitch

Here I was thinking you were gonna listen...

Shit's crazy
(Do you notice and recognize miracles,
So many miracles, the magic miracles)

 Are you a firm believer in miracles
Do you have time for the miracles
Do you notice and recognize miracles
So many miracles, the magic miracles
Are you a firm believer in miracles
Do you have time for the miracles
Do you notice and recognize miracles
So many miracles, the magic miracles
Are you a firm believer in miracles
Do you have time for the miracles
Do you notice and recognize miracles
So many miracles, the magic miracles
Are you a firm believer in miracles
Do you have time for the miracles
Do you notice and recognize miracles
So many miracles, the magic miracles

 Annnnd...No.

This song...There's not a single redeeming value in it. The beat is bad, the lyrics are HORRID, the music video freaks me out, and I just hate the song and everything about it.

I don't know what people find appealing about this music, but to each their own. Oh, and the only reason there was another song done today, is because I just got really bored and wanted to do something semi-productive.

If you want me to review a particular song, send it off to rantsinrap@gmail.com and I'll be in touch.

Until next time...I'm the LyriCritic, and if you question the lyrics...I probably will too.